Trust is the most important thing in marriage. It is the very thing that can bring peace or fear for any relationship, but more so for marriage. It’s the key to having a healthy relationship and without it life becomes seemingly intolerable.
Our very first year of marriage we had to walk through so many broken areas of our life that God was so gracious to expose. He exposed early on for me just how much I needed to trust him. As a new military wife with a husband gone for long periods of time, I had to trust the Lord would not only protect my husband but also would protect me. During the that first year I felt deep abandonment and loneliness. We had moved to a new country away from family and friends and my husband was gone all the time
During this season God gently exposed the nature I have of wanting to be in control. I am a planner and I like to make sure things go my way… well God knows this was a sin and He wanted all my heart. He still wants all my heart. When the control I seek is threatened, my anxiety shoots through the roof and I begin acting out of fear of loosing that control. It’s no wonder God gave me a life verse to walk in and REST in. He gave me:
Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”
Now, I will confess I have not always rested in this verse. When things aren’t going my way, I can be more apt to react in my flesh and not in the spirit. I’m guilty of being the woman with a tounge lit on fire and lacking self control. Anyone else? This hurts not only my husband and me, but it grieves he Lord. This has brought deep hurt and brokenness with in our relationship. When we’re not laying our hearts before the Lord and trusting His good will, we can allow the enemy of our souls a foothold to bring division.
This is why it is so important to be in His word and surround our selves with sisters in Christ.
3 Steps to Trusting God with Your Marriage
To be honest, it’s not just steps that deepen trust with God, it’s surrender and obedience. Surrendering your will and exchanging it for His. At the moment, I too am struggling with trusting God in my marriage. That first year that I spoke about earlier made me see how important it is to lay it before God and in God’s grace as he continues to move in the seasons of our life, he gently peels back the layers to reveal more.
Painful at times, but so good for our growth.
Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen.
Here are three ways we can trust God and resist the lies when we don’t know the every detail of God’s plan for our marriage.
- tell god about your anxiety and fears
- Write out scripture and put it in a visible spot as a reminder and a call to pray
- Get together with a trusted friend or mentor
